"Life is either a daring adventure or nothing." Helen Keller

bitchsLApped: Shilo Gets Schooled by LA Part 2 of 1000

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  1. They do not call that shit HollyWEIRD for nothin’. Wow. That place puts new meaning to the word “freak,” as in “freak-that-should-be-hospitalized-and-restrained.”
  2. Always read the parking signs. ALWAYS. Then read them again. And maybe one more time for good measure.
  3. Lost ticket at the parking garage? A fat bud will go a long way in buttering up the parking attendant and getting you out of the mighty lost-ticket fee.
  4. Speaking of green, it is practically legal here. They sell it out of jars at clubs, I shit you not.
  5. You know you are getting acclimated to life in LA when you pull into a parking lot, see the price is $10, and think: “Not bad!”
  6. If you meet someone who claims to be a celebrity or in a famous band, don’t immediately assume they are fucking with you and call them out. It could be Pendulum.
  7. Santa Monica and Santa Monica Boulevard are two very different places. Clarify BEFORE you leave the house.
  8. Two words: ANIMAL STYLE. Oh sweet Jesus.
  9. “Security Dogs for Rent.” Are you SERIOUS LA? Really? Dogs for rent?
  10. Hearing: “Yeah you LOOK like you just came from Hollywood.” = not such a good thing, I’m pretty sure. Please refer to #1.

lovinglafromthegettyI am in love with this city!

Author: worldromper

I write, wrestle wiener dogs, win big at skee-ball and wander at large on a world-size scale.

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